What I learned in College
I learned it’s all true. All the quips and quotes, all the bits of wisdom. When your grandpa pulled you aside after your parents told him about your “little girlfriend” whne you were 12. When your Dad grabbed your shoulder before prom. They were right. It’s all true.
“They are all crazy, just find one you can live with” I will start here, because it is the most debated. And the most accurate. Men are pigs, women are crazy, but every so often a pig goes crazy, it all works and everything is right with the world. For a period of time. Sometimes days or weeks, but if you are 99% of college students in the U.S. this bliss is shortlived. Crazy goes to far, or the pig gets too wild, and it all explodes. But it’s ok. 10 years pass, and you realize that she wasn’t the one, not even close, and what she did wasn’t so bad, and you shouldn’t have called her that name. But that clarity only comes when you find the one crazy you can live with.
“One day she will grow up to be her mother” Definitely true. Not always bad, but most definitely true. The thing is, it takes a long time to grow. And just when you think she has grown into the perfect partner for you, she realizes you are not what she wants. And so she goes away. And you have to start all over again.
“There are plenty of fish in the sea” Save the best for last? You damn betcha. It’s the best part, its why we go to college (well, most of us). To learn, to explore, to try new things. And by new things, I mean new girls. Lots of them. Try doesn’t have to mean what you think, either. But it is a great and wonderfull thing to know the touch, the scent, the feel of girls. And yes, I mean girls. Women are great, and you have a whole lifetime to live with them, but college, college is about the girls. long ones, tall ones, short ones, Brown ones, black ones, round ones, big ones, crazy ones. Thank god for the crazy one’s. There is only one way to learn.
“They are all crazy, just find one you can live with” I will start here, because it is the most debated. And the most accurate. Men are pigs, women are crazy, but every so often a pig goes crazy, it all works and everything is right with the world. For a period of time. Sometimes days or weeks, but if you are 99% of college students in the U.S. this bliss is shortlived. Crazy goes to far, or the pig gets too wild, and it all explodes. But it’s ok. 10 years pass, and you realize that she wasn’t the one, not even close, and what she did wasn’t so bad, and you shouldn’t have called her that name. But that clarity only comes when you find the one crazy you can live with.
“One day she will grow up to be her mother” Definitely true. Not always bad, but most definitely true. The thing is, it takes a long time to grow. And just when you think she has grown into the perfect partner for you, she realizes you are not what she wants. And so she goes away. And you have to start all over again.
“There are plenty of fish in the sea” Save the best for last? You damn betcha. It’s the best part, its why we go to college (well, most of us). To learn, to explore, to try new things. And by new things, I mean new girls. Lots of them. Try doesn’t have to mean what you think, either. But it is a great and wonderfull thing to know the touch, the scent, the feel of girls. And yes, I mean girls. Women are great, and you have a whole lifetime to live with them, but college, college is about the girls. long ones, tall ones, short ones, Brown ones, black ones, round ones, big ones, crazy ones. Thank god for the crazy one’s. There is only one way to learn.
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